5 upgrades we wish Apple would have made for iPhone 7

September 8, 2016

Dreamstime.com

Categories: 

Death, taxes and "the most innovative iPhone ever." These are the things that we can expect to see throughout our lives, like it or not. But could the new iPhone truly be more innovative this time around?

Apple has launched another iPhone with new features like waterproofing, doubling up the speaker power, a fancy schmancy new home button that people already hate and Air Buds...I mean "AirPods," the $169 headphones that probably won't fit properly and you'll lose instantly (worth it).

The new features are pretty cool, especially if you are a professional swimmer (unless you're Ryan Lochte, in which case, 'sup Ryan?). However, we have a few ideas that would have made the iPhone 7 a serious leap into the future.

Here are the features we would have liked to see on iPhone 7:

1. Regrow Air Buds feature...I mean AirPods: Look, we're pretty much guaranteed to lose these new-fangled wireless ear bud things as soon as we use them once. If Apple wanted to take this to the next level, they would have a 3D printer that created new Air Buds on demand (but not for $169 every single time, please).

2. iDon'tWorkout: Oh, you partnered with Nike to make it easier to track my workout? That's cool, but what if I never had to work out? Now introducing iDon'tWorkout, the most innovative wearable tech Apple has ever made! Sit on your couch while and smash Doritos while your iPhone electroshocks your muscles into shape while you smash Doritos and play FIFA. 

3. Shatterproof screen: Toast will always land butter-side down. Cats will always land on their feet. If your phone falls out of your pocket from more than three inches, you're screwed. You know, things that are inevitable. We fly humans to space and have machines that build machines that build machines. We are even creating cars that drive themselves. I find it hard to believe we haven't created a screen that doesn't crack when I think about it wrong. 

4. QWOP app: With advances in wearable tech, it's surprising we haven't reached "Smart Shoes" yet. Similar to iDon'tWorkout, QWOP would allow me to control my shows while wearing them QWOP style.

5. Android: Its new feature should be that it's an Android.

Follow The End on Twitter: @1077TheEnd