NFL Week 14 Preview: Which Avenger Would You Start A Franchise With?

December 6, 2018
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You ever have one of those days where you perfectly blend being lazy and productive?  You get all your work done, and yet you totally donk off as well.  The best.  As we get ready to ring in the new year, I hope your 2019 is filled with days like that. And tacos. 

 

Jacksonville vs Tennessee- Not sure if its the mostly dead grass on the field, or the color of the Titans uniforms, but I think it always looks cold in Nashville.  

Indianapolis vs Houston- I wonder if Andrew Luck looks at Deshawn Watson and feels like Fredo in Godfather II. "It was supposed to be me, Deshawn! I was supposed to be the chosen one!"

NY Jets vs Buffalo- Yo have you seen the new trailer for Captain Marvel?  IT LOOKS AMAZING!!!  Hey if you had to start a football team with one Avenger, who would it be?  Captain America would be a great choice. You could put him at QB, as he throws a mean shield. Plus he's a handsome "face of the franchise" guy!  Or maybe you would go with Spider-man. He'd be one of those once in a lifetime WRs thats fast, agile, and would NEVER drop a ball.  Of course someone is reading this right now and saying "HULK! He would be the best lineman ever, and while that person is probably right, imagine how annoying it would be to find out that your team drafted an Avenger.....and you had to watch him block every week.  I'd be pissed. 

New England vs Miami-  New England never wins in Miami, for whatever reason. But I say that changes this week. UNLESS Miami wears their throwback unis!  

Baltimore vs Kansas City-  Kudos to the Kansas City Chefs for releasing Kareem Hunt after video of him pushing and kicking a woman in a hotel lobby surfaced earlier this week.  Of course they knew about this back in February, so really they only got rid of him because of the negative publicity aspect of the story going public, not because they are anti-domestic violence. But I digress...

Atlanta vs Green Bay- Mike McCarthy has finally been fired as coach of the Green Bay Packers. Our long regional nightmare is over! Here's the thing though, He is probably going to get blamed for more than he should in regards to the Packers recent failures, but in time will probably be recognized as the franchise's 3rd best coach ever.

Carolina vs Cleveland-  You know the times are a changing when you almost talk yourself in to picking the Browns to win a game. 

New Orleans vs Tampa Bay- If you beat the Buccaneers in their home stadium you should be able to fly your flag on that ridiculous pirate ship in the end zone.  That should be a rule! 

NY Giants vs Washington- This week in Washington team news: team signs Reuben Foster, who was released by San Francisco earler for being involved in a domestic violence incident with his former girlfriend. Also, it appears Alex Smith is battling with some sort of infection he got after surgery to repair a broken leg he suffered during Thanksgiving.  Also, Mark Sanchez is now their starting quarterback because Colt McCoy ALSO broke his leg last week. So to summarize; Washington will sign you despite the fact that you beat women, but won't let you play quarterback if you take a knee to exercize your First Amendment rights, but thats ok because if you do play quarterback for them, chances are you will end up breaking your leg. I hope this team stays cursed as long as they continue to call themselves (team name redacted.) 

Denver vs San Francisco- I've decided to start a bourbon collection. About time for me to grow up and stop drinking Red Bull and vodka ya know? 

Cincinnati vs LA Chargers- I clicked on one of those target ads on Facebook the other day because I legit liked the coat being advertised. What a mistake. Not only did I have to do math to determine what size I had to get, but now the algorithm is hitting me with coat ads between ever other post.  Facebook needs to die. <checks Facebook 18,000 more times today>

Detroit vs Arizona- I'm too lazy to go back and see if this is true or not, but I feel that I've picked every Lions game wrong this year. 

Philadelphia vs Dallas-  I've been reading a lot about AI lately and what the future could hold.  Terrifying to be sure, but I also can't wait until we get to watch cyborg zombie Reggie White break robo Emmitt Smith in half in the 2050 playoffs. I mean, if our robot overlords allow us to watch football, of course.

Pittsburgh vs Oakland-  I hear the same thing at 2:09 PM ever single day and it might be making me go crazy(er).  Nothing against said audio, its fine, but having to hear it at the exact same time every single day will start to do things to a man. 

LA Rams vs Chicago- Your NFC Championship game preview.  Watch. 

Minnesota vs Seattle-  If you haven't seen the video of Bobby Wagner mic'd up last weekend against the Niners, WATCH NOW.  Man, I love these things and always end up getting sucked in and rooting for whoever they feature moving forward.  Seriously, they could mic up Hugh Jackson and by the end of the segment I would want him as our next head coach.  Dangerous! 

 

Last Week's Record- 8-8 (ugg)

Overall Record- 117-73-2