NFL Week 15 Preview:

December 14, 2018
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Thanks to everyone who came out to Deck the Hall Ball earlier this week.  What a great time, amirite?  We should do that again next year.  

 

LA Chargers vs Kansas City- Phillip Rivers and the Chargers deserved the win last night for their gutsy decision to go for two on the the last play of the game.  I wish more coaches rolled the dice like this.  In fact, I wish the NFL made games more interactive by letting fans pick plays. You could do it via twitter polls, the NFL's social media numbers would go through the roof, and that's all that matters. Hey speaking of social media and Phillip Rivers, watch this. 

Houston vs NY Jets- Every day this week, I've rode the elevator with someone who was eating their lunch.  GROSS.  You know how many germs are in one of those airtight elevator cars?  I don't either, but I imagine a ton.  If you can't wait until you get to your desk before cracking open your container of salad, you shouldn't be allowed on an elevator. NEW RULE. 

Cleveland vs Denver-  Congratulations to the Denver Broncos for once again taking a backup RB and turning them into a star and ruining my fantasy football team.  Its a tradition like no other! 

Oakland vs Cincinnati-  Is there anything worse than having the guy who considers room temperature to be 39 degrees in charge of the office thermostat?  No. The only time I get control is when I go in to the studio.  You better believe I keep it around 88 in there at all times, even after I thaw out.  

Washington vs Jacksonville-  More embarrassing?  Frosted tips, or rooting for the Washington (name redacted)?  

Miami vs Minnesota-  Oh what might have been for the Minnesota Vikings. Last year they made it all they way to the NFC Championship. In the offseason they picked up a high profile quarterback. They started the season 4-2-1...and since then the wheels have come off.  As an unabashed Vikings hater, this gives me much joy. 

Detroit vs Buffalo-  Bills quarterback Josh Allen, who basically stinks, somehow broke Michael Vick's record for most rushing yds in their first 8 games.  The Bills pass defense could end the season as the best in the league.  The Bills have won 4 games.  No wonder their fans drink themselves to oblivion before games. I'm not saying its right, I'm just saying its easier.

Tampa Bay vs Baltimore-  I had some drinks at Deep Dive inside the Amazon spheres and it was pretty insane.  They put caviar on a hot dog. So decadent.  I have no regrets.

Dallas vs Indianapolis-  So here's the thing, Jason Garett is somehow going to coach the Cowboys in to the playoffs.  At first glance, this is awful, because no one likes the Cowboys.  BUT, when you think about it for a second its actually awesome because that means Jerry Jones won't fire him and we get to spend another half decade watching a harmless Dallas team scratch and claw their way towards a playoff spot, only to be disposed of in the first or second round at best.  And that will be quite the payoff!  

Arizona vs Atlanta- Bird Bowl! 

Tennessee vs NY Giants- I read(!) one of those draft projection articles yesterday and it mentioned NY going after a quarterback from Duke.  I was shocked, because I don't keep up with college football and the last time I checked Duke sucked at football.  

Green Bay vs Chicago- Listen, I'm picking with my heart and not my head here, I know that.  

Seattle vs San Francisco-  Nothing I write here will be better than the video below, so I'm not even going to try.

New England vs Pittsburgh- Here's a huge game between two teams half the world loves and half the world hates. I hope it ends in a tie and somehow causes both teams to miss the playoffs.  

Philadelphia vs LA Rams-  Welcome to the Passing Of The Torch Bowl, brought to you by Firestone, I'm Brent Musburger...

New Orleans vs Carolina- It was revealed today that Johnson and Johnson baby powder has asbestos in it, and the company has known for decades!  GASP! To think we've been dusting our sweaty parts with poison all these years!  How dare you put my nether regions at risk without at least a warning label that I would never read. This aggression will not stand.  Its time to take a stand against Big Baby Powder.

 

Last Week's Record- 8-8 (awful!)

Overall Record- 125-82-2